Pics

First day of school

Little sister cooking

My new baby

The one chore they let me do, feed the chickens

The library slash my office, thats my desk in the corner

Somaon breakfast for the teachers meeting, eggs, cake, pie, tuna sandwiches, and hotdogs. Look mama all the food is the same color ahah

The First Week of School

It’s almost to the end of my first week of school and things are really starting to look up. Very few kids are in attendance but at least the teachers are holding some kind of classes. Mostly they are just having the kids copy down sentences and look at books, but at least is some kind of learning. They have told me that real classes will start next week and the children will start to come regularly. I don't if it’s just that my expectations have been lowered or if I am actually adapting a little to Fa'aSamoa but the pace of things isn't bothering me as much as it was before. I have a lot to be thankful for. I have my own desk in the library, which is lovely so I can escape from the kids between classes and plan or just open a book and relax for a minute. There is also an ancient laptop in the library that is as slow and infected as possible but I have been able to use it to type these posts when classes are running slow and I don't have anything to observe. I seem to be a school which doesn't have too much of a problem with teacher attendance so at least I won’t have to substitute all the time. My schedule is looking like I will be teaching English for year seven everyday then alternating English for years four five six and eight. I will even have a period in the afternoons when I can help with the youngins in years one two and three.  I am still a very discrete presence and am taking my time to really ease into things. That way I can get a good feel for how things are working and slowly start working myself in without creating too much immediate change that could cause problems. Like I said before I keep telling myself slow and steady wins the race, I mean I do have two years. I also feel that if the changes here come naturally over my course of time here then they may be more likely to sustain after I leave. I had a wonderful walk yesterday with two girls my age that I met at the young adult youth group at church. They speak pretty good English so I could enjoy the walk without stressing too much about being understood or understanding.  I hoping this will become a daily thing and maybe even the foundation for an excursive project in the community in the future. It seems when ever this adventure throws me a curve ball and I get frustrated and down, the next day it comes back with something wonderful. I guess that’s why they call it a roller coaster. I'm also starting to get to know the kids and everyday more and more people great me as I walk by. It also helps that they say my name not white girl. Over all things are looking up and I'm starting to feel hopeful again about school, although I am already counting the days till the next volunteer get together. I can honestly say I couldn't do this without my comrades. On average I'm sending over thirty texts a day reaching out to them. It makes everything better when there is someone to celebrate your successes, share your frustrations, and laugh at the absurdities.

School Slump

      So it’s the second day of school and to be honest I'm not quite sure how to feel. The same routine as yesterday as began and the children have spent the day cleaning, weeding, and moving furniture. The teachers just sit around or order the children around. I see the merit of this system because it seems to be a necessity and it inspires pride and ownership in the students. It is hard to accept from my very American point of view that time that is allotted for the children is being spent cleaning. It is also tough because we have all been looking forward to school starting for so long and I really wanted to get stuck in and it seems that won’t be happening for a while. The biggest challenge here is definitely patience. It’s all about waiting. Things take time, a lot of time, and everything takes two or three times what it does in America. I should be used to this as I have lived in several developing countries that have a similar pace, but it seems it will be my biggest adjustment. I have talked to some of the other volunteers and it seems that you start going by Samoan time some time after your first year. I can’t wait because right now all this sitting around and waiting, not to mention the incredible inefficiency of everything, is killing me. I know that school will slowly gear up and I’ll get stuck in, I also know that this will give me purpose and drive. It just seems that even getting that is going to be a while. I keep reminding myself that slow and steady wins the race. Hopefully this applies to the Peace Corp. It’s just hard because after so long waiting to feel integrated, to feel productive, to feel confident, you start to wonder if you ever will. Deep down I know I will eventually and every day I get closer, it’s just crazy to realize it probably won’t be till around my one year point. That means I have a year of feeling like a fish out of water and a chaos of emotions. I knew this went I signed up and it is all part of the adventure but as a person who is used to feeling in control and confident, sometimes that year without it feels like an eternity. School starting! This really means me sitting around waiting for the cleaning to finish and classes to start but hey at least it’s better than being stuck in my house!

Death of a Laptop

So I hate to report it but there has been a death in the family. After four years of loyal and dedicated service my laptop has taken its last breath. I left my computer at home last week when I went to English Camp. When I got back I started it up as usual and everything seemed fine. Then after uploading my pictures from the week, a sudden message appears on the screen “Emergency restart.” I oblige and shut her down. I pushed the button and the screen went crazy. Black and white lines, zigzags, and general distortion filled the screen before it went black. I did everything I could, take the battery out, charged it, and tried to restart but it seems that was the dramatic last throw of my computer. I am writing this blog from the ancient and infested laptop that my school has. It’s the first day of school and the children and cleaning and moving furniture. Since I don’t have a classroom to clean, it’s been a pretty boring first day but I'm sure that things will get exciting soon enough. A lot of stuff has happened since I last wrote; English Camp, All Volunteer Conference, a cyclone, and general shenanigans. Since my ability to write has been greatly limited now, I’m going to just go ahead and give some high lights.

Teaching Samoan children how to do the human note

Playing hours and hours of mafia with the other volunteers at camp

Cooking tasty food for everyone at night

Sleeping on a church hall floor for a week

Getting stuck in town for three days during the cyclone (which was just rainy and windy, nothing to big this time)

Going to see a movie!! It was so fun. I got to pretend I was back home for a couple hours

Meeting everyone in town for All Vol conference, with TVs, real beds, hot showers, and no bugs!

Eating at delicious restaurants in town and staying a crazy nice hotel for the weekend.

I will try my best to still post things as much as possible even without my computer!! Thanks for reading!

I’m Not Smelly and Gross like I Thought I Would Be

Before I left for Samoa I started what I liked to call me transformation, or so I thought. I stopped shaving my arms (don’t ask me why I did this, it was something left over from high school), I stopped straightening my hair, I stopped dying my hair, and I promised myself I would only shave every two or three days. I want to prepare to be a smelly hairy lady. I was sure that in the Peace Corp I would just have to forget all about my personal hygiene and get over it. This has not been the case, in fact far from it. I shower twice a day here, I get to wash and condition my hair every day. I shave everyday. I have to wear my hair up most of the time but I have come up with some pretty cute takes on the twist bun. I give myself a manicure and a pedicure once a week. I pluck my eyebrows. I brush and floss my teeth twice a day and wear my retainer every night. I have had a couple skin problems with bug bites and rashes, but in my new house this is not a problem. I’m not even breaking out in the humid weather because my face is being washed so often. I even wear cute clothes and make up when I go into town. I’m not this scabby, smelly, hairy and very unfeminine, unattractive person I thought I would be. In fact I think that all this time is making me more hygienic then I was in college. There were many a nights I skipped a shower to cram for a test, or went out and came home to crash with out even taking of my make up. It seems I maybe be more hygienic here in Samoa then I was in the United States. The truth of it is I could probably get away with not doing these things here in Samoa but it is one of my ways to keep hold of some part of me. Maybe I will become smelly and hairy later because I will realize how unimportant these beauty rituals are, but right not they make me feel good. So many things changed but I am really enjoying that my odor is not one of them. 

Making Pizza for the Family

Since I don’t buy my own food I have decided the best way to contribute to the house (as they wont let me buy groceries or contribute money) is to cook a nice meal for the whole family ones a month. For my first attempt I chose pizza. I ventured into town and got the necessary ingredients. When I asked what my family liked on pizza their answers were all different and generally included pineapple and an egg, two things I would never put on a pizza. After a little back and forth it was decided for the first attempt I should make my favorite kind and let them try it. My eldest sister and her husband seemed like they had had pizza several times before and were excited at the prospect. The rest of my family seemed excited but apprehensive. So I got my favorite toppings, onions, garlic, pepperoni, and green olives, I was going to call it an “Italian”. I though this was pretty funny as pizza itself was Italian. I brought the ingredients home and decided to tackle the most daunting element of the dish, the base. I had made pizza base from scratch before but it was probably five to ten years ago as part of an adventure with my father. Now it was go time and I was on my own. The first hurdle I encountered was yeast. I didn’t buy any. I though yeast was for big fluffy loaves of bread not flat crispy pizza. I checked the recipe again and thought maybe I could do with out it. Then I saw my host mother had some self-rising flower. Maybe that would help. So I used the original recipe but with self-rising flour hoping to compensate for the lack of yeast. Then I added all the ingredients and stated kneading. I left it to rise for half an hour like the recipe said, but upon the completed time it didn’t seem that the dough had risen very much. It had also gotten quit tough and dry, even though it had been covered. I thought this must just been normal and persevered. I pounded on the dough ferociously until it finally lay across the bottom of the pan. It was about half an inch thick but I just couldn’t physically get it any thinner, the dough was just too tough.  Of course my pizza had an incredibly thick and dense crust but over all I wouldn’t call it a complete failure. It was still very tasty and the toppings and sauce were delicious. We had a blast making it my two sisters watched me like hawks and giggled at my every move. I brought out my speakers and we all listen to some English music while it cooked. I was a fun experience and I had a great time. They all raved about how delicious it was, although it was agreed that next time there should be less flour. I didn’t win over my youngest sister, but my cousin smelt it from next door and made a special trip over just to try it. So next time going to use yeast and add a little more water to the mix, also going to spilt the dough up and make two thinner bases. Many lessons were learnt and I will never forget the looks of disgust and horror when I had my sisters try a pepperoni.

Some Days are Harder then Others

From my blog you can see that I don’t under go much physical hardship. My life is very comfortable in a material sense. I don’t sleep on dirt floors or even shower from a bucket. I definitely don’t have the luxuries of home but my needs are all meet. I safe, well fed, clean, and over all very physically comfortable. This does not mean that my time here as been a piece of cake. So far everything is still very new and exciting and this tends to overshadow nerves and doubts. I try and go out side everyday and look around and let the wonder of this place push aside any negative thoughts. There are days that this just doesn’t seem to work. There are days when the loneliness gets to you no matter how many people are in the room with you. There are days when you wake up and wonder what you are doing here. This happens a lot right now, as school hasn’t started yet so we haven’t started working. We spend our days sitting around, sleeping, reading, and if your lucking getting out of the house a bit for a walk. This question “why am I here” has become harder and harder to answer. This temporary gap in time between training and work has reeked havoc on our moral. We aren’t emotional or mental comfortable in our surroundings yet and we don’t have a purpose to push us through it. School will start soon and we will be able to bury ourselves in our work. The answer will become clear again and I know that it will all start to make sense. There will still be hard days, plenty of them I’m sure, but I didn’t join Peace Corp because I though it would be easy. I didn’t join Peace Corp to read romance novels all day either. This in between time has been tough on all of us. We were so busy during training we didn’t have time to face a lot of our emotional demons, but we have had nothing but time for the last few weeks. We have made sure to see as much of each other as we can. It really helps to renew your purpose and make us feel like we’re not in this alone. Over all the good days always out number the bad and the smiles out number the tears. There are moments of hardship and confusion but I just keep remembering to look forward a push on because greatness is coming, and like I said it always helps to look around and let your self be swept away by the wonderment.